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It was really bound to happen.
Phoenix was always telling him that he needed to be more careful That he needed to watch where he put his socks. That he should have his labratory there. And that he should stop drinking prune juice because it made his breath smell funny. But that last one had absolutely nothing to do with what just happened. Neither did the socks. But Phoenix did mention them constantly.
Of course this probably at all doesn't explain the sudden explosion from the lab. Strange colored smoke starts leaking out from under the door. Every where it touches warps into queer and unusual wallpaper patterns. Even the light bulbs. Likely some part of the new wallpaper is rather like the sort found in Willy Wonka's factory complete with snozzleberry.
A few moments after the smoke starts, Alec bolts out of the room and slams the door shut.
He could be heard cursing in strange and unusual languages as he worked on locking the door. Really, really locking the door. In several dimensions and in several undimensions.
Strangely, perhaps, an 'oops' wasn't heard right before the explosion.
Phoenix was always telling him that he needed to be more careful That he needed to watch where he put his socks. That he should have his labratory there. And that he should stop drinking prune juice because it made his breath smell funny. But that last one had absolutely nothing to do with what just happened. Neither did the socks. But Phoenix did mention them constantly.
Of course this probably at all doesn't explain the sudden explosion from the lab. Strange colored smoke starts leaking out from under the door. Every where it touches warps into queer and unusual wallpaper patterns. Even the light bulbs. Likely some part of the new wallpaper is rather like the sort found in Willy Wonka's factory complete with snozzleberry.
A few moments after the smoke starts, Alec bolts out of the room and slams the door shut.
He could be heard cursing in strange and unusual languages as he worked on locking the door. Really, really locking the door. In several dimensions and in several undimensions.
Strangely, perhaps, an 'oops' wasn't heard right before the explosion.
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Date: 2010-05-12 04:34 pm (UTC)More curious than perturbed about the sudden noise... it's that kind of household. Phoenix wanders out to, firstly appreciate the effects - secondly, to realise Alec's totally locking the door.
"Balrog?" It's the first thing that comes to mind offhand.
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Date: 2010-05-12 04:36 pm (UTC)Twelfth dimension...
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Date: 2010-05-12 04:44 pm (UTC)"Darling. That's not your Balrog expression."
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Date: 2010-05-12 04:50 pm (UTC)"I have a Balrog expression?" Yes, even in this semi-panicked state he will pause to ponder trivialities.
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Date: 2010-05-12 04:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-05-12 05:01 pm (UTC)He hasn't moved from the door.
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Date: 2010-05-12 05:17 pm (UTC)The living room door opens a crack, and Sam peeks out, having heard the noise but listening at the door first. "Do we need to evacuate yet?"
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Date: 2010-05-12 05:25 pm (UTC)"No Sam, we're all good here. Go finish your homework... or play outside... or... something."
There may or may not be sparkles coming from under the door.
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Date: 2010-05-12 05:39 pm (UTC)"Go pay Grandma a visit for an hour, baby." Oh yes, Phoenix will play it cautious whenever Sammy's concerned. Sam seems happy about being excused homework, and disappears with a grin to find his teleport.
"And what is that, exactly?" Phoenix asks, re the mysterious sparkly 'stuff' edging away from the door some. VERY reluctant to let anything touch him.
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Date: 2010-05-12 05:47 pm (UTC)Well, if not, they can always call.
"Vampire dust?"
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Date: 2010-05-12 06:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-05-13 01:15 am (UTC)"... I don't know?" He's still looking shifty eyed. And it doesn't smell like sparklepire.
It smells kinda cloyingly sweet. Like the sort of thing that'll give you a toothache.
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Date: 2010-05-13 03:54 pm (UTC)"Contagious? Poisonous? Humiliating? I'M NOT spending another three days looking like a freakin' PIXIE"
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Date: 2010-05-13 08:12 pm (UTC)"It's... not... well it might be contagious, it's not poisonous or humiliating," he says. "It's ... not like that at all."
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Date: 2010-05-13 08:16 pm (UTC)Yet.
"Okay, that narrows it down. Dangerous? Alec! What is it?" Phoenix takes a slow breath, counting to ten. "I promise I won't get mad."
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Date: 2010-05-13 08:20 pm (UTC)"Um..."
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Date: 2010-05-13 08:27 pm (UTC)Could be the Bourbon he's consumed?
"Tell. Me. Could be kinda important."
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Date: 2010-05-13 08:28 pm (UTC)>.>
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Date: 2010-05-13 08:36 pm (UTC)"No. NO! How could you let that happen?? Fuck! Kill it! KILL THE MOTHERFUCKER! ... Wait. Did you say contagious???"
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Date: 2010-05-13 09:24 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-05-14 08:19 pm (UTC)"I don't wanna be a ... one of those. Or get a dose of male pregnancy.. or... Open the door. Let me shoot the motherfucker."
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Date: 2010-05-14 08:23 pm (UTC)He pauses. "You'll just want to love it and cuddle it and think it's the most wonderful thing ever."
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Date: 2010-05-14 08:27 pm (UTC)"Well... how.. what's the usual thing to do?"
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Date: 2010-05-14 08:36 pm (UTC)Alec thinks for a moment. "I wonder if we could age it until it's a teenager and then get it to die a tragic death. They love those."
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Date: 2010-05-14 08:54 pm (UTC)Phoenix nods, playing with the blaster. That sounds feasible. "Or get it outta here and get it adopted?" They like that too.
He doesn't want the bloody thing dying in his arms.
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Date: 2010-05-15 04:02 am (UTC)"Who do we hate enough to do that to?" he wonders.
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Date: 2010-05-15 10:27 pm (UTC)"Oh!" Then a flash of the most awesome inspiration hits him like a brick in the face. "Oh gods... Alec! This. Is a fucking golden opportunity."
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Date: 2010-05-16 06:11 pm (UTC)"You want to give her to Norrin?"
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Date: 2010-05-16 09:21 pm (UTC)"Noooo.. nono. We'll age her up, give her what they love! A story. Mysterious old cottage between dimensions; tragic, haunted being in possession of the kitchen table! Lonely piper, condemned never to rest. She'll love it!"
Why yes. He's quite prepared to use this to solve the wee small domestic problem of a noisy kitchen. "They'll spend forever gazing into each other's eyes and being emo. It's perfect."
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Date: 2010-05-16 11:35 pm (UTC)"I don't think a cranky old Scottish bagpiper is good romance material..."
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Date: 2010-05-16 11:40 pm (UTC)"Have you ever actually seen what he looks like? Can't we de-age him or somethin'?"
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Date: 2010-05-16 11:44 pm (UTC)"You can't de-age a ghost and I can't bring people back from the dead."
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Date: 2010-05-16 11:54 pm (UTC)Okay. Things to deal with.
"Huh. Pity. I'd love a peaceful breakfast. You sure he's old? Maybe he died young - and his being dead is great.. he'll manifest himself for her.. 'cuz he will, 'cuz she's special. And they'll be doomed never to be able to touch, kiss or all that stuff." He's clearly having trouble letting go of the idea.
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Date: 2010-05-17 12:02 am (UTC)"I'm sure he's old. He's called us all youngen's," he says. "Besides even so, how is he going to get out of the table?"
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Date: 2010-05-17 12:17 am (UTC)He's beginning to give up on that one, and takes out his frustration by aiming the blaster at the sparkle-dust, firing, and burning several holes in the floor.
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Date: 2010-05-17 12:22 am (UTC)"Well... he only seems to go into kitchen tables in places that I live." Alec scratches his chin. "Maybe he's haunting me."
"You're fixing that."
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Date: 2010-05-17 12:29 am (UTC)"Okay, fine. We're gonna have to age her up and pack her off to boarding school. Or do that there tragic death thing you mentioned. Or fucking kill the bitch ourselves...!" More firing... He does have some immunity to these creatures, but is still very unhappy about the contagious nature of the dust.
"Don't worry, I'll fix it, okay? After."
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Date: 2010-05-17 12:33 am (UTC)That and the dust leaves a stain.
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Date: 2010-05-17 02:32 am (UTC)He does actually quit with the ineffective strategy of shooting at things.
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Date: 2010-05-18 05:40 pm (UTC)"Daddy? Where are you daddy?"
"Fuck," Alec says.
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Date: 2010-05-18 08:09 pm (UTC)"You're not to open the motherfucking door until she's in her nineties."
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Date: 2010-05-24 08:03 pm (UTC)"Phoenix. Darling. Love of some of my lives. How old are you?"
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Date: 2010-05-25 04:18 am (UTC)"You've created a motherfuckin' IMMORTAL???"
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Date: 2010-05-25 05:49 am (UTC)Really, why does Phoenix think he keeps them in jars?
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Date: 2010-05-26 04:41 am (UTC)Bizarrely perhaps, he's never associated things living in jars with immortality.
With the possible exception of Ori.